Afraid

I don't know what to feel anymore. I want to feel numb to most things said, because it seems better than feeling the pain of rejection. I shouldn't worry about rejection because I just came out of a relationship...but that doesn't seem to matter. I go without word...without acknowledgement..without any decency of being at least a friend. I shouldn't worry about what he or they think. But I do...because the feeling was never lost it was just forgotten and it re-emerged after some time.

It's not just him but it's them. i feel rejected by those most close to me...like no matter what I do...it's never good enough.